Fire Proof

Sunday night we had a movie night at the church. We showed the movie Fire Proof. If you haven't seen the movie, you definitely need to. I had heard several things about it...one being how much of a low budget movie it was. That didn't even cross my mind as I watched the movie unfold. Instead I was focused on the storyline and how every married couple or couple thinking about getting married, should be watching this movie.

Seth and I have been married for almost eight years (June 16, 2001). I married a minister so I assumed everything would always be perfect with our marriage. One thing I learned pretty early on is that ministers and their families struggle just like the average person. I am so independent and have always been. I prided myself on that fact. I can support our family myself if the need be and I have pushed myself further and further in school to prove it. I earned my bachelor degree in one year, my master's in one and my specialist in one and a half years, all by the age of 27. (Okay technically I finished my course work for my specialist at 27 but I didn't turn everything in until after I had turned 28 :) ) I probably would have finished them at an earlier age if I hadn't of gotten pregnant at 23 after three years of marriage. SURPRISE!!! :)

Seth was so focused on ministry and I was so focused on my academic career that we hardly spent time together and the time that we did spend together was focused on ministry. We were just two people who got to live together and sleep together without sinning! :) Only just in the past couple of years have I realized that we need to be a family and not two individuals living under the same roof. Even the best marriages struggle and unless we are unified, we'll never withstand temptations.

I've come to realize just how important my man is to me. What a good husband I have, what an awesome father. I know I am extremely lucky and I had NOTHING to do with it! I look back on our eight years together as man and wife and I see how much we have grown. I now understand what people mean when they say, "I love this person more today than I did the day we got married." When I look at my sweet baby Caleb, I fall more in love with Seth because he gave me that beautiful baby. I love the fact that he can take care of Caleb just as well as I can. I know that Caleb is learning how to be a father, from his fathers example and that in turn teaches him about God the Father. I love that for some stupid reason, I really think he thinks I am Mrs. America. :) and you should see me when I wake up in the morning! Scary....

Most of all though, I love that my man first has a relationship with God. It is evident in everything that he does. I know that he can demonstrate love to Caleb and I because of the love and relationship with God that he nurtures on a daily basis. I am learning that the dishes and laundry can wait if it means more time spent together as a family. I am learning to show love and encouragement instead of negativity. I used to think that if I nagged enough or showed displeasure, Seth would get the idea and things would miraculously change. I still find myself falling back into those patterns especially when I am stressed but I am trying to love by example and not by pure expectation. I know that I will never be the perfect spouse and I know that we have MANY trials ahead of us but I am confident that as long as we continue to put God first (and by God, I mean GOD and not ministry) and as long as we continue to work at our marriage, God will lead me and guide me.